Looking For Nishta In All The Wrong Places
by Suz suzvoy@tesco.net

Disclaimer - MGM/Gekko/Double Secret own them.

Things have been mad lately (life and work). This is all I could manage. Contains swearing. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. Spoilers for 'The Broca Divide' and 'Seth'.

'Seth' episode insertion. What if they hadn't been freed of the nishta's control when they had been? What if they'd still been open to suggestion? What if they'd been all too happy to please their God...?

Use of ~~~~~~~~ indicates a change in the point of view.

Cheesy, sleazy, a lot like another one of my other stories. Do I care? NO!

*

Sam smiled at Her God. His eyes were glowing magnificently.

She had been woken not long ago by a beautiful woman who had asked her if she was ready to serve Her God. Sam had been more than happy to comply - the world was a wonderful, peaceful shade of green.

It was truly a perfect day.

Her God spoke again, questioning, and Samantha answered as quickly as she could, not wanting to disappoint Him. Not wanting Him to believe for even a fraction of a second that she wasn't worthy enough to serve Him.

She would do anything to serve Him.

There was a vague sense of...something. She was supposed to be doing something else, but what could possibly be more important than serving Her God?

Her answer to His latest question caused the biggest reaction from Him so far. He almost looked surprised - although He obviously wasn't, because He was a God.

He soon smiled. "Leave us!"

The room quickly emptied as other faithful believers followed His instructions.

"Except you," He added, speaking to someone apparently picked at random.

Sam didn't know who it was and didn't turn to look - all that mattered was Her God, so she remained where she was; kneeling next to His throne and smiling up at Him.

When they were alone, He continued.

"I will admit," He began. "That human reproductive practices are too messy for my preferences,"

Sam nodded vigorously. Of course. His way of doing everything would be superior to them. He *was* superior to them. They were fortunate He was so tolerant of their inferior methods.

Her God kept talking. "But never let it be said that I deny my subjects anything. Please, demonstrate these practices for me." He smiled.

Happy that there was something specific she could do to please Him, Samantha stood and faced the person who was standing a few feet behind her - the person Her God had asked to remain.

The man's face was familiar, vaguely. She may have met him before, but she couldn't truly remember.

Apparently as happy to serve Him as she was, the man stepped towards her and they embraced.

Lips met, parted, then met again. Hands explored, caressed, touched.

Samantha sighed into another kiss - this was a most pleasant experience. She felt as if...as if nothing was quite real. As if this were a dream. Her whole life had become a wonderful green-tinged dream since Her God had blessed her.

The mans hand slipped under her top, touching her bare skin-

*FZZZT*

~~~~~~~~

*FZZZT*

Holy shit!

Holy shit!

Holy SHIT!

What the hell was he doing? What the hell was she doing? What the hell were *they* doing?

And why the hell was her hand on his-?

WOAH!

Jack pulled away - his head anyway - to confirm that, yes, he had just been in the process of ravishing his 2IC.

O...

...kay.

Then he remembered their situation. Then he remembered what was happening. Then he remembered that Seth was just a few feet away, no doubt wondering why they'd paused.

Okay.

Okay.

She looked as dazed, stunned and breathless as he felt.

She licked her lips unintentionally.

Okay.

Clearly they were no longer under the effects of that nishtar stuff, which meant Daniel wasn't under its effects either. This in turn meant he'd (hopefully) start zatting people ASAP and get back here as fast as he could.

But until he did...

Until he did...

They had to keep going. If they stalled any longer Seth would know something was up (oh GREAT terminology, Jack). They just had to...keep going...until the cavalry arrived.

Okay.

And of course he'd arrive before things got too far.

Okay.

This was something he'd never asked of his 2IC before. Heck, this was something he'd never even anticipated asking of his 2IC before.

But from the very slight, very subtle nod that she gave, he knew that she understood.

Of course she understood. She was Carter. She probably understood better than he did.

There was, of course, the huge stumbling block of regulations, but hopefully they wouldn't have to report it, and if they did these were definitely mitigating circumstances.

This was all about power, no doubt about that. Seth was doing this just because he could; to assert the fact that he controlled them and could make them do this, even if they didn't want to.

Which - of course - they didn't.

Damn he hated his job sometimes.

He tried not to make it awkward, but of course it was. Discounting that little alien virus incident (which, if he were honest with himself...which he wasn't, so he briskly moved on) they didn't have any experience with each other. The very idea was against regulations and could lead to court martials...

HewasnotenjoyingthisHewasnotenjoyingthis...

...transfers...

HewasnotenjoyingthisHewasnotenjoyingthis...

...other nasty, nasty things...

HewasSOnotenjoyingthis...

How had they ended up on the floor? But then he hadn't been paying much attention to his equilibrium had he? The whole thing had been thrown out of whack when she'd...

Hereallyreallywasnotenjoyingthis...

Of course, this was feeling *real*. Before, when he'd been under the influence of the nishtar, everything had been dream-like.

Everything had been kinda green, actually.

But more importantly, it'd felt like a dream, like his senses weren't really connected, like he was...numbed to the sensation.

Oh how he almost wished a certain part of him was numbed right now. It'd make things a whole lot less confusing.

Okay, think hockey scores, fishing, a certain pair of blue eyes...nope. Wrong track.

Okay, think naquada, think wormhole physics, think the woman with a certain pair of blue eyes explaining wormhole physics to you...

Zat fire. Zat fire! That was zat fire! God bless the owner of that zat gun, even if it did turn out to be a Goa'uld.

Seth was up and out in a matter of seconds, no doubt to investigate.

And there they were, still on the floor. Still kissing. Still exploring.

Just until they were sure he'd left the room.

Just to make it look convincing.

Just so...

Their mouths separated. He didn't think he'd ever forget the sound of her gasping.

His hand was...somewhere it really shouldn't be. Quickly removing it, Jack rolled away and stayed on the floor, staring at the ceiling, wishing more than anything for a cold shower.

This was *so* not good.

Daniel thudded into the room, closely followed by a group of freshly-zatted teenagers.

"Uh...hi," Daniel greeted.

Jack said nothing. He just tried to roll away from him.

"Got the first lot done. We should get them out of here."

Get out of here.

Good idea.

Get Carter out of here.

Even better idea.

"Carter...you..." kissedmeIkissedyouandnowI'mcompletelyscrewed "Use the rings and get the kids out of here. We'll track down Seth."

She was still breathing heavily. "Yes sir," Pulling herself up, she shook her head then directed the kids over to where the rings would appear.

Jack was going to find this Goa'uld, and make the bastard pay for totally fucking up his life. Then he'd set about trying to forget that he and Carter-

Carter.

Carter.

Jacob Carter.

Jacob Carter had probably initiated the pulse. Jacob Carter had been listening the entire time thanks to their earpieces.

He was going to have to face Jacob Carter.

Holy shit...

~FINIS

go to poking and prodding and penlights and probing

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